when i needed to decide whether to carry my third pregnancy full-term or have an abortion, i already had two sons and would have loved to try for a daughter. however a low back injury make it too dangerous to go full term. so, i decided on an abortion and had my fallopian tubes tied off at the same time.

imagine how much more difficult it would have been to give the children i already had the love, attention, and physical interaction if i’d been forced by appallingly restrictive laws to give birth and had become disabled, possibly unable to even walk.

at the time, fortunately for me, it was legal, easily accessible, and affordable. that is not nearly the case today. who is demanding to make these kinds of decisions for us? who has the right to judge another? men, of course, as well as brain-washed, ultra right-wing, have-everything-they-need women. shame on you. imagine… what you would do in similar circumstances. hopefully, you would choose your existing families, as did i.

it is, and must remain, a personal, private decision and none of anyone else’s concern.

growing up, our neighbor, a catholic woman, died giving birth to her thirteenth child – against her doctor’s advice but according to the catholic dictum. then i watched the father, with his now 13 children, fall into abject poverty; watched the family come completely apart; watched the children end up in multiple foster homes; watched as the father became mentally ill from unthinkable stress and immense losses, eventually committing suicide.

their church did little to help them during their time of great need. in fact, it demanded the children remain enrolled in its private, catholic school – but would not, did not, offer scholarships for the required tuitions.

a wonderful family totally ruined, because an outsider made critical decisions for them – demanding they comply with the church’s strictures of no family planning (except the inordinately unreliable “rhythm method’) and absolutely no abortion for whatever reason, as both are considered “mortal sins”. she lay dying, because, again according to the church’s dictum, the child must be saved first, even at the risk of the mother’s life. period! after witnessing this senseless tragedy, it was easy to choose my existing family as my first priority.

now, the shame-makers and law-makers are trying to do the same thing – by improperly imposing their values on others. shame on those who would deny women their natural and constitutional right to choose. i say unto them: walk in another’s shoes first and judge not – lest you be judged.