my story isn’t special or any different, but it’s amongst the many others here and i find solidarity to be important in a time of confusion, stress and sometimes turmoil. i found out i was pregnant in november 2015 in (ironically) my appointment to get the implant birth control in my arm. me and my boyfriend had been a bit unsafe and i decided i wanted to get on birth control just in case. i was shocked, obviously as i have pcos and my doctor for years had told me that getting pregnant may be a difficultly for me in the future. obviously it wasn’t. i don’t know why i knew prior but i somewhat knew that i was going to be pregnant and although it still was a shock i knew what i was going to do. me and my boyfriend of only 2 months had already discussed what i would want in the event of an accidental pregnancy. although i’m 25 years old, i haven’t finished my masters or ph.d or traveled everywhere i wanted to, and i know it may be selfish but i felt i rather be selfish on my own than selfish with a child. so the decision was easy, but the waiting, not so much.
i was only 2 weeks pregnant and i had to wait 16 days to schedule my appointment. and within those 16 days i found my emotions hard to contain, the nausea was awful and i was just so stressed out, and honestly that was the worst part of the ordeal, the being pregnant for 2 and a half weeks longer than i wanted to part. as they need you to be further along to ensure that your pregnancy is legitimate as in intrauterine and attached, because if not a different approach would need to be done.
the day finally came and we got there at 6:55am and not long after we got there many others arrived, there were quite a few girls in the same situations as me. all waiting in the waiting room. we smiled at each other shyly, in recognition of our situation and with sympathy as we all know we rather be anywhere else. shortly after, religious protesters gather outside and began chanting “murderer” or “thou shalt not murder” or “an abortion doesn’t make you not pregnant, it makes you the mother of a dead baby”. i am not religious at all, but this would affect anyone, really and in light of recent events (the planned parenthood shooting in colorado) i was pretty nervous for mine and others safety. thankfully a tall and robust security guard helped patients to and from their car.
i got my ultrasound and she could barely find it and said i was just about 4 weeks pregnant. she was kind and gentle with me. which i appreciated. all of the doctors were so nice, my counselor was very supportive and my boyfriend was a perfect person to have there with me. he didn’t need to say much but hold my hand and rub my back and make me laugh. after my ultrasound, counseling session (where they go over your choice and the procedure and the aftermath) and the lab blood draw, i was taken upstairs to fill out the insurance papers. shortly after, i was taken back, changed, given an iv for the sedative and anesthesia and rolled to the or. i was told to take deep breaths and just like that i was or and it was over and i was awake in the post-op room. they gave me juice, antibiotics and all my information in a package. it was so easy and smooth that it really helped the severity of the situation. i don’t regret my decision nor feel any turmoil about it, it was my choice and the right choice for me and my body and my life. that’s all that matters. i suggest anyone going through it seek solidarity via friends or online and that anesthesia was a great decision if you go the procedure route. afterwards, there were mild cramps and a little bleeding but it’s been 3 days since my procedure and i feel normal again. i feel as though my body is mine once more and that i can breathe. don’t be afraid to make a choice. so many woman go through this. and so many women and people care and want to help.