i was 16 going on 17, my boyfriend at the time was crap. he was abusive and manipulative, he though i would him since i lost my virginity to my first boyfriend a year before. he would call me a whore and would coerce and force me into having sex with him. after i found out about him cheating on me i went to the clinic, i was tired and i wanted to know i was okay, no std’s.

that was the when i found out, i was one month pregnant. no symptoms were present, i was completely shocked. i cried very hard, i never expected to become pregnant. i had just gotten off birth control to switch and just happened that during that window of time, he had raped me. so, there i was 16, pregnant to a guy who treated me like crap. i made the decision to terminate the pregnancy all by myself. after all i got myself into the situation, (maybe not all by myself), but i knew i could afford a baby. even though i knew i could take care of a baby, i couldn’t be a mom. it is one thing to take care of other peoples babies but to actually have one and raise it by myself, i couldnt do it.

my mom had been on vacation and i wasn’t about to tell my father, he would have killed me. not literally but he would have disowned me. so i asked a really good friend of mine to accompany me. we went to the clinic a week after, fortunately, i was very early in the pregnancy and i just had to take pills. one to stop the fetus from growing and the other to induce the miscarriage. in the course of 48 hours i wasn’t pregnant no more, i broke up with my ex and i decided that i need to undo all the mistakes i had done. i got my grades in check, i tried to be a good friend to everyone i left behind. and i decided i did what i had to do for myself and for the future of my future children.

now at 21, looking back now the decision i took back then was mature. my present would have been completely different if i hadn’t done what i needed to do. at the age of 19 i broke down and told my mother, she forgave me and she told me that she was proud of my choice because it was my body and only i knew what was good enough for me.

so to anyone who is in the same situation, know that only you can my the decision for yourself. weigh your options and specifically don’t doubt yourself.