two years ago i was 14 years old and in an abusive relationship with my boyfriend. after a year together he raped me and that was how i lost my virginity.

soon after i was nauseated all the time and had missed two periods. i took a pregnancy test which confirmed my worst fear and then took another 2 weeks trying to figure out what was the right thing to do.

i never told my boyfriend that i was pregnant, he would have been so upset. my friend took me to a clinic to have the abortion and it wasnt until this year that i came clean about it to my family. he still doesn’t know and i don’t plan on telling him. this made me realize i had to get out of the relationship and i did. i still think about the baby sometimes. what he or she would have been like. in august the baby would have been one years old. it could be taking its first steps and every once in a while i wonder if i made the right decision. i think i did. for the baby. i couldn’t have been a good mother at my age. im just not ready.