i was 19 years old and had just started casually dating a guy. he was a nice guy, but he worked with me at my part-time job and i definitely wasn’t interested in anything serious. i was going to college and he was content with his lack of ambition. i was taking the pill at the time, but my class schedule and work schedule made it difficult to take it at the exact same time each day.

i think this is what caused it not to work, because lo and behold i got pregnant. i never even considered keeping it. i wasn’t ready for children. i was 19. i was going to study abroad in italy the next year. plus, my partner would never be able to properly take care or even pay for a kid. besides the fact that i wasn’t planning on having him in my life forever. so i told him and asked him to come with me, he hesitantly agreed. i drove us to the clinic at 6am. an escort met us at my car because there were protestors outside the front doors. the whole process of blood tests and ultrasounds take hours. about three hours into the process my boyfriend insisted he needed to get to work, that he couldn’t call in because he had no good reason to give. overwhelmed i let him take my car to work. i went in and got my abortion alone. the procedure was a bit painful but i had a coaching nurse that made me feel safe. she asked about my school plans and what i wanted to do after i graduated. afterwards, my good friend came and picked me up and took me home. i have never for one moment in my entire life since then felt regret for my decision. i think about the experience occasionally, but the only thing that makes me sad is being left there alone. i went to italy and graduated college. i am now creating a life for myself, one that will eventually include children that i have planned.