i had one abortion when i was 21. i am now 68. i am a rape survivor.

i was raped at 4 by my father. i had little relationship with my family and found myself pregnant from a man i barely knew. i had been drinking. shortly after i found that i was pregnant, my sister came to me asking me to care for her and hide her from our parents because she was pregnant. abortion was illegal so i had to find a backstreet provider. it was horrible. first my cervix was packed to induced cramping for a day. then i had the procedure without any pain meds. it was suction. the next day, i was in terrible pain so i went back. they had missed tissue and did a d and c again without pain meds. it was excruciating. i spent the next year afraid that the police would find out and arrest me. i also had a nightly dream that a tiny two inch girl walked beside me and i stepped on her. i worked and took care of my sister. she had a girl and gave her up for adoption. my husband and children know this story. i told a different sister a few years ago and she pronounced me a murderer. abortion has to remain legal. making it illegal does not stop abortion. it, instead, makes it unsafe.