i am now in my seventies. when i had my abortion it was not yet legal, nor were there birth control pills. i was 19 and in love with my college boyfriend.

i was working in new york for the summer because it was his home town. i practiced the rhythm method of birth control which worked for several months but then i got pregnant. if he had helped me i would have had the baby but he was horrified at the thought. i knew i couldn’t do it alone so i agreed to have an illegal abortion. we went by bus to harlem where a nurse inserted a stick like object into my uterus and told me to go home and drink gin. i think my boyfriend paid her $100. the next day the 7 week old fetus came out in the toilet. it was a tiny blob. a day or two after that i started cramping and feeling feverish so i called the nurse. she said to go to the women’s hospital. i spent the night in a ward and had a d & c the next morning. i was lucky. 2 years later i married a man who wouldn’t have married me if i had had a child. i finished my education and went on to have 4 children. i never regretted the abortion or felt guilty about it. i felt sad for awhile but i was mostly mourning the breakup with the boy i loved. the type of abortion i had was dangerous and emotionally stressful. women today are so blessed to have access to good birth control and safe abortion.