i’ve had 2 abortions, one when i was 19 and one when i was 23. i was with a man a lot older than me, and by the time iwent to planned parenthood to get the pill i was already pregnant.

i can’t say why it never had occurred to me that i would get pregnant before that, but it just didn’t. i told my mom and she took me to the clinic. i remember there were protesters outside and they made a difficult situation that much more difficult. i was upset about it after; not regret or judgment, more like sad over the loss of this potential child. i stayed with this older man and i felt guilty enough to get pregnant again later that year. i had my daughter, and then when she was around 3 i got pregnant again using a diaphragm. this time there was no doubt that i wasn’t prepared for another baby…i had recently gone back to college and while i was still with this older man, i knew i had to take care of myself. i told him both times and he was “supportive”. i never told anyone but my sister about the second one. both my mom and my sister confided in me that they had also had abortions so i didn’t feel judged. i’m not at all religious so i don’t put any stock into what a god would think about what i did, and i have zero regrets. my choices enabled me to finish college and graduate school. only my closest friends know about the first one, and it’s just something i keep to myself. i’ve been with my present partner for 15 years and i’ve never even told him.