i was raised in a catholic family in the 70’s. family, traditions and values were important to my parents. i graduated from a parochial high school and wanted to travel as a flight attendant after school. well life takes different paths and as it would happen i met someone in military service and fell in love. i was only 17 and he was 19 when i discovered i was pregnant. i was scared, confused and didn’t know where to turn for i knew my parents were pro-life. my boyfriends officer told him where to take me to take care of “this problem”. somedays i can remember clearly how i felt like i was a lamb led to the slaughter for i had no where to turn for questions i wanted to ask but was too afraid to seek after. my boyfriend dropped me off at the clinic and i can clearly remember girls screaming while we were taken care of. i actually went to work that night standing and working in retail and tried to forget that horrible day. i ended up marrying that man and we never spoke much of what we did. i dealt with the anguish over the years and as the march for life came every year my daughters ( i ended up being blessed with several times over ) would come to me and wanted to participate i pretended to be sick each time. as years went by i humbly have sought forgiveness and feel that god has forgiven me. still, it remains something i wish i could have changed. i look forward to meeting my baby someday in heaven. i wish there had been someone that would have taken me aside and had me listen to my baby’s heartbeat. daily i thank god for his mercy and his grace upon grace. i will never judge anyone for their decisions i just know that as for me it was a decision that lives with me every day and will to the day i take my last breath.